If you truly want to get control over your drinking, once and for all, you really need to stop trying to stop drinking. Wait? What? It’s true and I’m going to tell you why the power is in the pause.
Stop Trying To Stop Drinking
It’s counterintuitive. It’s controversial. It’s what makes This Naked Mind – the book, the methodology, everything – so different from anything else. I call it “the pause” and it’s the reason behind why I tell people to keep drinking. Personally, I didn’t find success until I stopped trying to stop drinking. That is what gave me permission to ask questions. Obviously, if you’ve already stopped drinking, I’m not saying you should start again. What I am saying is that if you are stuck in the cycle of stopping, setting rules, breaking them, and blaming and shaming yourself – STOP.
Put your weapons down. Give yourself grace. Try a different way.
What Worked For Me Instead
I didn’t find peace in my relationship with alcohol until I decided to stop trying to stop drinking. Trying to stop wasn’t working and wasn’t bringing me any closer to a solution. If anything, it was just making my problem worse. I decided to try something else instead. I asked a simple question – “Why? What changed?” Why was it that drinking was something I could care less about for years and now I could barely imagine a day without it? I let curiosity take over instead of blame and shame.
The Pause Isn’t Permission
The pause doesn’t give you permission to ramp up your drinking and go full throttle. It is an invitation to start researching. Use this time to dig deep into the inner workings of not just how you work but also into how alcohol works on you. We all have a litany of reasons we drink. The benefits we believe that alcohol is bringing us. The things alcohol can fix or make better. The pause is when we start unpacking those reasons and start examining our beliefs to see how true they are. You get to stop trying to stop drinking but it is because you’re shifting from being the participant to being the researcher. The student is taking on the task of teaching themself.
Your Research Handbook When You Stop Trying To Stop Drinking
How do you start your research when you stop trying to stop drinking? Download a preview of This Naked Mind and start your study!
Why Does The Pause Work?
Earlier I referred to the power of the pause. This place and this work you’re doing during the pause really do hold incredible power. Right now, you’re probably in a place where you have lost all trust in yourself. In fact, you no longer even feel as if you’re capable of change. You’ve been on this rollercoaster for so long and time and time again, you let yourself down. That is a really, difficult place to move forward from.
You regain power when you stop focusing on all of the ways you’re letting yourself down. Your power shows up as you learn why you’re drinking and what changed. The greatest power comes when you harness the incredible knowledge you’ve been gathering and begin knocking off the fallacies and myths that kept you drinking for all that time.
Knowledge Is Power
I’m not afraid to say you can stop trying to stop drinking. Take the pause. Do your research. You may find, like I and so many others have, that taking action is almost easy once you have changed how you feel about alcohol. If you’re thinking this pause and this journey might be easier with others – check out The PATH. You’ll find others who are also ready to stop trying and start getting curious there!