I Must Be An Alcoholic – Shirley’s Naked Life

Shirley found herself thinking “I must be an alcoholic” as her control of alcohol kept slipping away. Learn how she found control (and kept it) with the help of This Naked Mind!

must be an alcoholic

Always going back to alcohol

I didn’t think much of it but I remember as early as my 20s feeling stressed if I couldn’t afford wine to have with dinner. As I got older and more financially independent, wine became a daily, evening occurrence. By my late 30s, I was drinking with dinner and going to the pub at weekends. This particular pub had lock-ins. It wasn’t unusual to drink a bottle of wine before going out and then spending 6 hours in the pub drinking just about anything. Despite the regular hangovers I still didn’t think much about it and wasn’t worried about my drinking. It was based on what was then a great social life. Around my mid-40s I used hypnosis to stop my drinking. An accidental diagnosis of a genetic liver condition scared me into stopping. Apparently, though the condition is something you are born with and not something caused by alcohol, after 6 months I went straight back to the drink and pub binges.

I must be an alcoholic

In my early 50s, I moved house, the pub going ceased and the drinking was then around a bottle of wine each night. I worried about maybe being over the limit the next day. I had a lot of trouble sleeping and would wake up in the middle of the night. I’d often wonder if I was an alcoholic, I didn’t think I’d be able to stop. I wouldn’t want to go out for any reason because then I couldn’t drink. This worried me, I thought I must be an alcoholic. I knew it was controlling me.

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Unable to control my drinking

I’d tell myself in the middle of each night that tomorrow I wouldn’t drink, I always did though. Every night, I’d get in from work and pour some wine, and then continue. The next night, I’d be awake again making the same promises. I tried hypnosis again but was unsuccessful in controlling my drinking.

Early 2021 I was watching TV with my wine in hand and I thought “why am I even drinking this, I’m not enjoying it.” I started to look at One Year No Beer. That is when I found the book while looking online.

I don’t want to drink anymore

Right then, I decided that I didn’t want to drink anymore. My liver was playing up and I figured that although not caused by drinking it couldn’t be helping. I’d ordered the book and started reading it on my stop day. It really resonated with me. I began to realize that I’d been poisoning myself daily for about 35 years. Reading the book stopped my drinking. I’ve not had any alcohol since 13th February 2021. I was careful not to have it in the house initially but soon my partner was able to have his lager in the fridge, I have absolutely no interest in it.

Life after alcohol

i must be an alcoholic freedom from poison

Okay, so I got fatter rather than thinner but am taking control of that now. 🙂 I have more energy. Now I am more confident in my business and with customers. I feel so damn proud that I stopped and hopefully have extended my life. I sleep better, my brain doesn’t start up in the night. Instead of sitting in front of the TV feeling dozy, I spend time on my photography and photoshop hobbies. I deal with stress much better and have no anxiety anymore. I’m excited about future holidays and socializing, now I can drive anywhere and try different places.

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Did This Naked Mind take you from thinking “I must be an alcoholic” to finding freedom from alcohol? Whether it was our booksthe appthe podcasts, or another program we want you to share your story here and inspire others on their journey!