Have you ever said you “drink like it’s your job”? Linsey decided she was ready to end her drinking career and reclaim her life. Her Naked Life story shows that it’s not about how many times you stop drinking as long as you keep going.
The Start of My Drinking Career
Today, I am 39 years old and 53 days alcohol free. I am so excited about my future without the poison that is alcohol. I guess you could say my drinking career started in high school. My first real consequence from drinking happened my senior year when I was caught drinking rum and Cokes on a senior trip to Europe. I was not going to be allowed to walk the stage with my graduating class of 1995. In response, I changed schools and moved out of my parent’s house at 17 years old.
Fueling My Addiction
This is where things went from bad to worse. My father died of cancer when I was young, which means I had access to money that funded my drinking and drugging. In high school I evolved from pot-smoking hippie, to beer drinking punk-rocker, to wine guzzling goth-girl, and eventually landed in the Ecstasy pill popping rave-scene of the 90’s.
Not surprisingly, my downward spiral eventually landed me in the psych ward with a misdiagnosis of bi-polar disorder. I got out two weeks later and picked right up where I left off – drinking. I managed to get sober long enough to get pregnant, marry the wrong man, have a baby and get divorced by the time I was 22.
The fact that I was divorced, in my mind, gave me permission to drink as much as I wanted to because I was “going through a divorce.” I was a “young single mother.” Woe is me!
Continuing My Drinking Career
Eventually, I decided to return to college after once flunking out and earned a bachelor of science degree. I graduated in 2004 and held down several jobs. I continued to foster toxic relationships with multiple alcoholic men who didn’t balk at my drinking. After a particularly abusive, domestic violence-laden alcoholic relationship, my son went to live with his father when he was only 8 years old.
This was by far the lowest point of my drinking career, especially since my son’s father’s drinking was worse than mine.
The First Try
I somehow managed to hold a job and never got a DUI, but was I miserable and sick and tired ALL of the time. When my son was 13 I decided enough was enough and I got sober for the first time. I went to AA and successfully stayed sober for 6 months. I loved sobriety! In 2012 I met and married the man of my dreams, then slowly but surely convinced myself I didn’t really have a problem, and that I could try “moderation.”
My subconscious thinking had NOT changed.
Ultimately, I still felt like I was depriving myself by limiting how much I drank.
Getting Off The Roller Coaster
At this point I lost yet another job, became deeply depressed and almost suicidal. I quit drinking again. Things once again get better, I scored the job of my dreams and for the last two years have toyed with sobriety and moderation in equal measure. I’m ready to get off the roller coaster. The way you put it in the book is spot on! My subconscious conditioning was fighting everything inside of me that recognized the poison that is alcohol is hurting me.
Now that I have experienced a true shift in my subconscious thinking, I have no desire to go back to the way I was.
I do feel sorry for my family members who truly think they find joy in alcohol and the ritual of drinking. I am able to be the queen of wife and mother I want to be when I am free of it. The freedom I have found in “not having to drink” is the most beautiful feeling in the world. I am the best version of myself like this!
Want to find out more? Start reading This Naked Mind today for free!
Share Your Story
Today I am vibrant, confident, poised, energetic and God-filled. I am a successful interior designer who thrives on the creativity that is fostered by a “naked” mind, free from the fog and shroud of a hangover. If I can do it, you can too – share your success story!